Hey guys!
So this post has been a long time coming. I finished secondary school back in June and I have never been happier. Some people say secondary school (high school) are the best years of your life but honestly I think I've always known I was one of those people who blossom in college.
I went to an all girls' school which I didn't mind. One thing you learn fairly quickly however, girls can be so vindictive and horrible to each other it's unbelievable! The majority of my primary school went to my secondary school because it was only up the road. That meant the majority of my friends were in the same school and most were in my class for the first three years. I started with a friend group that more people from different schools gradually joined and I had new friends.
I've always had friends outside my group because I hated the exclusivity of 'cliques' and actually had some good friends outside of school as well. I met one of my best friends in second year and she wasn't in my group at all. From second year I noticed that some of my friends had the tendency to exclude others, namely me.
I never really let it bother me because I mean girls are mean and there's nothing you can do about it. I had a few boyfriends in secondary school as well, something my friends never really had until the later years. In TY it got considerably worse and some days I would genuinely come home and cry. I mean you can only ignore something for so long until you finally crack. I don't really know why they excluded me but to be honest I don't really care anymore, they were nothing but mean and I don't need that negativity in my life.
Come 5th year I just decided to ignore them and try make new friends... not as easy as it sounds when people have already had 4 years to solidify friendships and cliques. I mean I made do, I had people to eat lunch with and to be honest that's all I cared about. Until you go to an all girls' school you genuinely do not know how horrible girls can be. I saw the girls in the corridors and some were in my classes but I never really bothered to make conversation or anything.
The school were aware of the issue as well. I don't know why (maybe they didn't see exclusion as a form of bullying even though it very much is), but they never did anything about it. They just brushed off the information that my parents had told more than one member of staff at parent teacher meetings (something I was never aware of until recently). None of the girls ever apologised either. They knew exactly what they were doing and still didn't care that they were actually hurting someone.
I had a handful of friends in school and more than enough outside of school that my final year was actually pretty fun. Now, after the debs, that chapter of my life is closed and I never have to think about the girls that I once called friends ever again.
College is a fresh start and I've already made some fab friends through sport and my course. I already feel so much happier most of the time and cannot wait to see what will happen in the future!
Bullying, any form of it, is so common in secondary school and emotional bullying is very popular amongst girls. If you are being bullied or know somebody that is, speak out about it. Go to a trusted friend or adult. There are so many services available for teenagers and you should not be afraid to talk to someone about it. Childine has a free text service that is available should you ever need to talk to someone. Text Talk to 50101 to avail of their free service.
Most people do get bullied at some stage in life and I'm not trying to gain sympathy. I have wanted to do this post for so long just so I could get it off my chest and hopefully someone in a similar situation to mine will be inspired to talk to someone after this.
Ciara,
xoxo.
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